I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
