There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize