last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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