a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
