be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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