I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
