two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
