He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
