plz talk dirty to me
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
