The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
there was a trapeze. enough said
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Can you bring me the toilet please
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
