they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
