She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
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