You made me cry and you don't even care
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
this will be a night to untag.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
