he shaved USA in his pubs
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
