she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
