Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
