he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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