we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
