Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
