where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
