I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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