I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
