i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
She has the best kind of daddy issues
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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