Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
