Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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