didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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