I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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