Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
