yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I will be naked everywhere
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
