OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
