Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Randomize
