Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize