well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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