Banned from zoo.
Again?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize