Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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