You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
