I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize