You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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