I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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