Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
My vagina is very pro this idea
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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