It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize