that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
