CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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