she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
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