i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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