shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Your cock deserves a montage
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
