The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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