Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
