Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
