one might say we're banned from that church
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
