woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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