Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I think I am morally bankrupt
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Randomize
